Loving Ourselves

Because of the tendency to mistake having Agape for yourself with being narcissistic and self-centered, I'd like to explain exactly what I mean by "Love yourself".

It means taking care of our needs, and making sure we are not pouring from an empty vessel.

In the Bible, we read "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?", in 1 Corinthians 6:19.  While in context, this passage is about sexual immorality, which I will address later in this blog, I much prefer the Mormon take on this verse, expanding it to literal fact.

What do we do with a temple?

We keep it free of impurities.  Therefore, part of loving ourselves is not taking in excess things that are harmful to us, such as cigarettes, or alcohol, or other chemical concoctions.

We build it of the strongest materials we have, so that it will stand the test of time.  Therefore, we eat healthy, and exercise, not out of a need to conform to the fickle standards of societal beauty, but in order that the temple that is our body may house our spirit for as long as possible.

We adorn it with beautiful things.  Therefore, we wear clothing that accentuates our own natural beauty, rather than trying to wear "the latest fashion".  Remember, things don't have to be expensive to be beautiful.

We build it in a place of peace, serenity, and beauty.  Therefore, we keep the space where we live clean, a place of sanctuary where we can recharge, and invite others to share in the peace of our household.

A temple is itself a place of serenity and peace.  Therefore, we must work within ourselves to find peace and serenity, to deal with the emotional scars life gives us, that internally, we may be emotionally stable and at peace with who we are.

We do not allow anyone to desecrate or defile our temple.  Therefore, we do not associate with those who are unhealthy for us, and do not put up with those who would use us for their own ends.  We create emotional, and if necessary, physical boundaries, and stick to them.

We seek the help of others in our community to maintain and continue to beautify our temple.  Therefore, we seek out those who bolster us, who provide us with the emotional support we need to grow and learn, those who help us most to seek our own personal Truth. We seek out those who will help us with our emotional and mental stresses, who will help us to clean our mind of them.

A temple is a place where you commune with God.  Therefore, we learn how to pray, in whatever manner that comes, and are in constant communication with the Divine.

We consult with experts in design and engineering, that it may remain as we build it.  Therefore, we go to our doctor if we are not well, and to our psychologist if there is need, and do not hesitate to seek the help of professionals, should we need it.

We keep a temple clean, outside and in.  Therefore, we maintain a regular habit of good personal hygiene.

It has been my greatest failing that I do these things only on an irregular basis.  In the past, I have had a great deal of trouble learning to love myself, tending to take care of the needs of others before I take care of my own.

This is what I mean by pouring from an empty vessel.  If we have no love for ourselves, the love we have for others will tend to be hollow, at best.

In none of this should we take it to the point of obsession, to the point of focusing so much on ourselves that we fail to see others as sacred houses of spirit.  Once we take these simple things to extremes, then is when things tread into the zone of arrogance, vanity, and narcissism, and then we have lost the true meaning of self-Agape.